My assignment this week, in readiness for my upcoming goal setting for next year, is to figure out how I want to feel. This seems very straight forward. How does anyone want to feel?

Happy,

joyful,

purposeful,

successful,

loved,

appreciated.

Does that about cover it? I would really like to avoid all the negative feelings. 

I wrote last week about what I wanted in 2020. I think I'm on a mission, and believe my job is to paint hope, light, and love in the next year. It all started this past year when I discovered how amazing the concept of light is. 

Light can be a metaphor.

Light symbolizes love for me.

It symbolizes God for me. 

I was struck by the realization that once I figured out what my purpose in life was, light seemed to be everywhere. It crept through the thick foliage of evergreens in the early morning. Somehow it reached the ground cover below. Even on the gray and drizzly days so famous in this part of the country, somehow light managed to highlight a tree, a branch, a frosty leaf on the ground. And the colors it highlighted in the autumn where gorgeous!

And how did I feel when I saw that light?

I smiled, I felt a spark of hope, I felt a trickle of joy.

It's not surprising then, that light became my focus. 

I have a long history with chronic depression, and I recently became medication free. I'm feeling emotion again for the first time in nearly 20 years. Emotions are not for the faint at heart, my friends. I can go from calm to tears in a nanosecond. And those tears don't mean sadness exclusively. I cry because I'm happy, I feel loved, you said something nice to me, or because I remembered a particularly good piece of my history. Then yes, there are tears of sadness occasionally too.

It's possible that in my healing process I discovered light because the darkness isn't surrounding me any more. It's possible that when I decided to work hard at healing and returned to reading and studying my Bible I also discovered love and light within me. I think , as with many things in life, all things combine for a positive outcome.

The good thing for you is that because I found light, you can experience what I see, what knocks me off my feet, and hopefully what I feel.

Because when I feel those great positive things called love, joy, hope, happiness, and appreciation they call me to paint. And when I paint I have to share it.

I really do have to share it, because what's the point otherwise? To hang it on my wall, put it in a drawer, or my infamous rejects box? That would be a tragedy. That would only bring me disappointment, lack of appreciation, and sadness. There's way too much of that available all around us.

So I'll make a deal with you.

I will continue to look for light in the world around us.

I will continue to paint it as I see and feel it.

And it you would, please, check in every now and then and see if one of those paintings is yours. When you see that painting that makes you stop in your tracks, inhale, and drink it in, let me know. It's probably meant just for you.

If you live in the Seattle area I have a show coming up. I will be the featured artist in the Beach 1 Gallery for the month of January, 2020. My show is titled, "Nature's Glow." The opening reception is at the gallery on Friday January 3rd from 5-7. It's a great opportunity to see light filled nature up close and personal.

Thank you for your interest and support.

Until next time.

Dru