I am very blessed to live on acreage, and I have the best landlord known to man. She always responds immediately to any needs and is thankful for each effort I put forth to make her house a home.

I'm also a small business owner with a new business, so money is tight. So when my daughter and I moved into the house and I needed to purchase equipment to keep the grounds in decent order I bought the bare essentials.

I bought a self propelled mower. It's not a riding lawn mower.

I don't really enjoy mowing the lawn, but love how it looks once it's mowed.

The spring is the most challenging time, because we typically get a lot of rain, so in between glimpses of the sun, the lawn grows really well.

Thick, tall, wet lawn is a challenge to mow.

When I mow I walk 5 miles in the front and 3 miles in the back. 

In the spring I can typically make one complete pass before I need to empty the grass catcher.

That's because it gets full and then drowns out the blade and then the lawn mower dies.

As I was mowing this morning I was beginning to be frustrated with my lack of progress, and it occurred to me that I am also feeling full to the brim and drowning.

Maybe you feel it, too.

I'm full of frustration with political warfare and racism.

I'm full of concern for those who are throwing caution to the wind and have given up on the wisdom of science.

I'm full of frustration with the tug of war between working on my business and taking care of my household.

I'm full of anxiety over an uncertain financial future.

And I'm full of self doubt.

It also occurred to me that given the proper tools, we can all live life more fully and joyfully.

I used to live on 7 acres that was mostly pasture land.

I loved mowing the lawn.

We had a 48 inch riding lawn mower, and when I mowed I was given 3 hours of blissful nature.

I had the right tool.

I also wanted an escape.

The stress and uncertainty inside my home drove me out side.

My yard was worthy of a magazine spread.

I would work all day out there and into the night.

I weeded, planted, and laid down beauty bark.

My spirit is much more peaceful now.

I love to paint and work on my business.

I have the proper tools for that.

I hired a business and art coach.

I buy the proper paint brushes, paints, and papers.

I have a matt cutter.

I continue to seek out new learning experiences.

And I have returned to my roots as a Christian.

I study the Bible and have an active prayer life.

And yet I become full to the brim with anxiety and frustration.

I think it's a human condition.

And I think it's a reminder to me that I need to use the tools I have to remedy my humanness.

In my business, I have a business coach, and if I want my business to succeed I need to listen to her gentle advice.

Sure, sometimes some ideas don't fit with my inner consciousness.

But sometimes I just don't want to do something that I find difficult.

So when my business doesn't progress I'm the one standing in the way because I'm not using the tools at my disposal.

The same is true when I get anxious about the future.

When God reminds me that He is control and will take care of me, I have a choice to believe that, have faith, and move beyond the anxiety, or I can hang on to the anxiety and add another clump of grass to the grass catcher.

With each frustration and anxious thought I choose to hang on to, my grass catcher gets a little more full.

Eventually I will be full of damp moldy feelings that weigh me down.

And you know what?

When I'm full of that yucky stuff, no new, good, or hopeful thoughts can get in.

The past two times I've mowed the lawn, the lawn mower has quit working.

Only after resting a while will it allow me to restart it.

I think there are two reasons for this.

First, it's possibly over heating or flooding with me trying to force it to work when the grass catcher is full.

And secondly, perhaps when my stubbornness of wanting to get back to my business takes over my feelings of exhaustion, a forced rest period for my own physical and mental health is needed.

Whatever the reason, I'm inside out of the sun right now, and putting the inspiration I received down on paper, or computer screen, in this case.

What tools do you have in place right now that can help you get some of that junk out of your heart and mind?

Friends and family are great tools that I have at my beck and call.

Caring people who listen and love me despite my mistakes and selfishness help me verbalize and get my feeling out of my head and heart.

Writing also helps me process my feelings and get them out so I can visually look at what has been stuck in my brain.

I'm also finding that my practice of doing yoga before bed has more benefits than I realized.

I appreciate that my muscles get stretched out and my breathing is calmed.

What I didn't realize was that when I am resting in that peaceful state afterward, that my mind often brings some anxieties and unresolved issues to my consciousness.  

It's an opportunity to write those down.

If something is still coming up it's like that dried on, caked on grass layer surrounding the blade housing on the lawn mower.

Eventually that layer becomes so thick it causes a problem.

I'm looking forward to emptying my grass catcher that is full of unwanted waste more often.

I'm going to search out and fill up on everything that is positive and beautiful.

The good stuff hasn't gone away.

It is still right there for us to see and grab on to.

I hope you can see it, too.